drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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