Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
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