This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize