Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
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When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
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