So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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