i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize