omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
