i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
