I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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