in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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