why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Randomize
