Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
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