careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Randomize
