Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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