literally had 100 drinks last night.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
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