i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
All the doctor said was why
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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