why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
I know her cup size but not her name....
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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