Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
