I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
This couple is walking their pig around campus