Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
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