I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
