i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Randomize
