Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
