The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
