brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Randomize
