College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
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