you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Randomize
