Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
