I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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