i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
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