I am full of burrito and curiosity
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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