Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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