I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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