Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
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I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
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I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
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