ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Someone signed my nipple.
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