i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Randomize
