Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
we're making bets on your personal life
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize