yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
