im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
