In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Randomize
