i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
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