i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
