she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
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