Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
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