Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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