Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
