Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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