I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
P.S. I can't hear my feet
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
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