she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
