ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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