at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
